


Why can't we be friends?

by Milk_and_Egg



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hinata first person POV, Hinata hates himself, Hinata lives in his own apartment, I'll try harder with this fic I promise, Junko doesn't try to end the world, Komaeda also hates himself but what else is new, Komaeda can be an asshole, Komaeda cares about things other than hope, M/M, Nanami plays games, POV First Person, Reserve Course Hinata, Slow Build, forced friendship, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-25
Packaged: 2018-08-13 01:36:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7957093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milk_and_Egg/pseuds/Milk_and_Egg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hinata needs to love himself a little more. Nanami thinks she knows someone who can help with that. Komaeda doesn't have any friends. Nanami thinks she knows someone who Komaeda can be friends with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting another talented student

**Author's Note:**

> Goodness I always hate writing the first chapter of a story, It'll get better I promise! This is going to be kind of a short story since I have college to focus on, but I'll try!

Welcome to my empty apartment! Well not really empty, but it feels empty when it’s just me here. I’m actually not alone either… so I guess I’ve contradicted myself. Anyway…

I’m Hinata Hajime and I live by myself. My parents pay for me to live here in this one-bedroom apartment just like how they pay for me to go to the prestigious Hope’s Peak high school. Don’t freak out, I just go to the prep school. I don’t have a talent. However I do know someone with an amazing talent.

Nanami Chiaki is the ultimate gamer and one of my good friends. Sometimes after school we meet up and play videogames. We also play online when I’m home and she can’t come over. She is also the student council representative for her class. Whenever I compliment her about how amazing she is she brushes it off and tells me I am too. 

Right now Nanami is in my living room playing old games with me on my couch. Right now my apartment doesn’t feel so empty, but it will when she leaves. I take my eyes off of the screen for a second to look at her, she’s focused. She’s wearing her casual clothes right now instead of her uniform. It is spring break after all. Her eyes look dull in color; they always do when she’s focused on gaming.

While I was distracted she shot me with her tiny pixel gun and won the round. She let out a little sigh of a laugh and turned to face me. “That’s seven to three.”

I groaned in response. “Well that’s what I get for challenging the best gamer around.”

At that she glares at me. “You know I hate it when you say that.”

“Sorry, you should really learn to take a compliment sometime.” I smile at her and stand up to stretch. “I’m going to get a drink, do you want anything?”

She pauses before shaking her head ‘no’. 

I turn away and head towards the kitchen, which isn’t very far. The kitchen is about ten feet from where I was standing. It was pretty small and in the center of it was a tiny table with three chairs for in case my parents came to visit. I never tell them that I always eat in the living room. When I reach the fridge I open it and pull out a bottle of water. When I turn from the fridge I see Nanami standing right behind me and I jump a little.

I laugh. “You scared me.” 

She doesn’t return my smile for a few seconds and when she finally does it looks a little concerned. “Am I your only friend?”

I was kind of shocked at her question. She wasn’t my only friend, but she was the only one I really hung out with. “No I have other friends, why do you ask?”

She looks down before popping her head back up. “I have a friend… well he’s more of an acquaintance, and he doesn’t have many friends.”

I shot her a confused glace and put the bottle on the counter because it was really cold then I turned back to her. “Okay… and?” 

She didn’t change her expression but she looked at me for what seemed like an eternity. “He doesn’t think very… highly of himself and I think he could really use a friend.”

I cocked my head at her. “So you want me, a boy who doesn’t like himself in a way, to be friends with another boy who also doesn’t like himself. This sounds like a therapy session or something.”

She glared at me once again. “It’s not like that… no one at school wants to get to know him and he could use someone new.”

“So you want to use me to make your talented friend happy again?” This time I glared back at her.

She sighed and sounded agitated. “No listen, he’s not my friend, he doesn’t let me call him my friend. I’m not using you; I just thought you could also use another friend. And he never was happy to begin with.”

“If he won’t be your friend then why would he want to be my friend?”

She paused and looked down again. “He doesn’t think he’s good enough to be my friend. He doesn’t try to be friends with anybody at school.”

I narrowed my eyes at her feeling somewhat betrayed. “Are you implying that I’m not as ‘amazing’ as you so I’ll be the perfect candidate for this guy’s friendship? Wow and you said you hated it when I called you-“

“Shut up with the self loathing for a second!”

I stopped and softened my gaze at her.

“I didn’t say any of that. Komaeda is a complex boy. He thinks so much differently than us. I just think he needs some outside perspective. And you are someone new. I thought maybe if you see this guy you wouldn’t think talent was so special.” She brought her hand up and folded them together like she was begging. “Please just try, for me.”

I kept my expression neutral. “Why would I think that about him?”

She looked off to the side again but kept her hands where they were. “His talent is his luck.”

I gave her another confused look. “Luck? That’s a talent?”

Nanami glared at me again. “See? This is why he hates himself. Yes, his talent is luck. His parents died and he got their money, he was kidnapped and they let him go, he won the lottery, he has a terminal illness but he got into Hope’s Peak.”

I was a little surprised. “What? His parents are dead? He’s going to die? How do you even know this stuff?”

She looked down as she spoke. "He told us himself." 

This time I looked off to the side. “A-alright. I’ll try.”

She looked back up and smiled. “Thank you so much Hinata-kun!”

I didn’t know what to say so I just nodded.

She turned around and walked to the front door. “I have to go, See-ya!”

I ran after her “Nanami wait a sec!”

She just kept going. “I’ll introduce you to him later!” She started trotting down the stairs.

As I watched her go I sighed and closed the door. It was time to watch TV I guess. The apartment feels empty again. As I settled back onto the couch I thought about the weird conversation. So she’s worried about this guy because he’s depressed. What was his name again? Something with a C? Or a K maybe?

I turned the channel to the cooking channel. I should learn to cook more things. I looked around and realized I left my water in the kitchen. I groaned and got up.

To get to the kitchen I passed through the door to by bedroom. It was small as well with just a tiny closet, a queen sized bed, and my desk for homework. I always make sure my room is clean because to get to the bathroom you have to go through the bedroom. I grabbed my bottle of water and turned back to the couch.

Just then I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I pulled it out of my pocket to see the little picture of an obscure video game character, it was Nanami. I unlocked my phone as I sat back on the couch. My eyes went wide as I read her message. “Komaeda (that guy I was telling you about) and I will be over later so please don’t be naked. :p” 

What? They’re coming here? To my tiny apartment? No absolutely not, Nanami sure but not this mystery guy. I sent her a quick message. “No.”

It took a second but then the phone buzzed in my hand again. “Fine but please put some pants on.”

I had to laugh at that but then I put my serious face on again. “I didn’t mean the naked part, dummy.”

“Why not? You already agreed.”

“Because my apartment sucks.”

“No It doesn’t I live there most of the time.” She doesn’t she just needs someone to play old video games with her. She sent another message. “He doesn’t want to go anywhere else.”

I groaned. So she left so quickly to find him. He must not be far away because she only left a few minutes ago. “Why too embarrassed to be with me in public?” I quickly erased that message and replaced it. “Fine.”

“:) Be there later!”

I dropped the hand with my phone in it on the couch. Great maybe he’ll feel sorry for me now. I liked my apartment, my parents pay for my rent and schooling with just enough money to fend for themselves. I’m not greedy and I do feel sorry for taking all of this money from them, but they promise it isn’t a burden; I know it is though. 

About an hour later there’s a knock on my door. I tense at the sound; I didn’t realize how nervous I was. I quickly turned off the TV. Then I stood up and made my way over to the door. There was another knock. I took a deep breath. Another knock. I opened the door to see Nanami and I didn’t know where her ‘friend’ was until I seen a cloud of white move behind her a bit. “Hello Hinata-kun may we come in?” She smiled sweetly at me.

I nodded and moved aside suddenly feeling shy. She moved past me and then I seen the boy. I didn’t realize that I wasn’t breathing until he was in my apartment. He was so… attractive, yeah that’s the word I was looking for. He had white hair that stuck up like a cotton candy. He was also tall and skinny; he was a good few inches above me. He was wearing a green jacket with black jeans. He looked around seemingly bored. Then he glanced at me, still holding a bored expression. “Nice to meet you, Hinata-kun.”

I gasped without knowing it at the sound of his voice, it sounded so soft. “N-nice to meet you too.” 

Nanami walked up to us and paused. “Well have fun; I’ll be back later to get you, Komaeda.” Komaeda sighed at this.

I turned toward her. “Wait, what?”

“I’m leaving you two alone. Be friends, I’ll be back.” In my confusion she walked by me and out the door I left open.

For the second time today I ran after her. “Hang on, Nanami!”

She waved and skipped down the stairs. 

I groaned and shut the door again. When I turned around Komaeda was looking around my apartment curiously. When he spoke I jumped. “This is it?”

It took me a second to respond. “What’s ‘it’?”

“You. Are you it?” He spoke monotonously and crossed his arms.

I was confused. This ‘ultimate’ seemed pretty rude. “Uh yeah I guess.”

He looked me up and down, arms still crossed. “You’re not special.”

I glared at him. “Aren’t you a ray of sunshine?” Then I realized I just back talked an ultimate. Oh shit what if he calls the police or something because someone without a talent like me talked to him like this?

He looked surprised for a second before smiling. “I’m just telling the truth.”

Okay if he isn’t freaking out then it’s alright. I glared again suddenly hearing his words. “Oh yeah? What’s your talent again? Luck? Wow must have worked hard for that one.” 

This time he smiled wider and glanced down. “You… you get it. You know that I’m trash. I’m not worthy of going to that school. Even someone so boring gets it.”

I looked confused. Should I be mad at him for calling me boring, or should I be sympathizing with him? Instead I just looked at him. 

He responded by walking past me and sitting at the little table in the kitchen. “So, Hinata-kun, tell me about yourself.”


	2. I tried I really did

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for the lovely comments, I love it when you guys do that!

‘Why is this marshmallow-head sitting in my house?’ Was the thought I was having right now. After he insults me he decides to make himself at home here in my apartment. I breathed deeply; I have to do this for Nanami, just for today. I sat across from him at the tiny dining table. “You want to know about me? I thought I was boring?”

Komaeda smirked and put his head on his hand. “Maybe you’ll prove me wrong, who knows?”

“Well… I live here alone, which I guess is different from most students.” I glanced back over to him to see him looking into my eyes and smiling. I sighed and continued, looking away from his gaze. “I’m a reserve course student-“ 

I was cut off hearing a thoughtful “Hmm?” I glanced back over to him to see his smile gone.

I shot him a puzzled expression. “What?”

Komaeda smirked again at my offense. “You like Hope’s Peak too huh? A wannabe.”

I choked at nothing and narrowed my gaze at him. “Yeah I like the school, and so what if I want to go there?”

His expression remained solid. “It’s a very nice school, lots of hope behind those walls. Too bad you could never go there, with how boring you are.”

I stood up abruptly. I was already tired of him. “Why? Why are you being so mean to me? No wonder you don’t have any friends! You’re an asshole! Why does Nanami even care about you?” I stopped shocked by what I said. It just came out, I didn’t mean it. He’s terminally ill for god’s sake! He has every right to be bitter. “K-Komaeda… I’m s-“

He stopped me by laughing. It wasn’t a welcoming laugh; it was more of a maniacal laugh. When he calmed down he had tears in his eyes, but his eyes looked darker somehow. “I wish more people were like you Hinata-kun. Too bad you’re… never mind.” 

I must have looked like a deer in headlights to him, I could feel it. “Do you like being insulted?” I spoke carefully.

He laughed again, this time more of a giggle; if I wasn’t scared I might have called it cute. He shook his head. “Of course not, who likes being hurt? I just deserve it. You give me what I deserve. But you’re so…” He paused and looked up in though. “So… insignificant that I can’t benefit from you hurting me.” He looked satisfied with his words.

I was even more confused than before. “You make less sense every time you speak. What are you talking about?”

He sighed impatiently. “I benefit from others hurting me; that is how my luck works. My parents were killed but I received everything they had. I was kidnapped but I found a winning lottery ticket in the trash bag they were keeping me in. I was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia and stage three lymphoma, but I was accepted to the wonderful school that you desire to go to.” He pauses from his explanation and looked at me. “You cannot hurt me in a significant way and thus I cannot benefit from you. You are a waste of my time. This is a waste of time” He raised his arms to emphasize what we were doing.

It took me a little while to take it in and understand what he said, but when I did I still didn’t know what to tell him. Does he just tell everyone he meets this personal stuff? “Uh… do you want a drink or something?”

He looked a little surprised at what I said but smiled anyway. “Sure, whatever you have is fine.”

I walked to the fridge, opened it, and paused. “You like water?”

He made a small laughing sound. “We do need it to live.”

I groaned and grabbed a bottle. I turned around and tossed it to him, he caught it effortlessly. “Thank you Hinata-kun.”

I sighed. “Yeah whatever.”

As he sipped we drifted into awkward silence. “So… uh how long do you have to live?” I immediately regretted what I said. Great topic of conversation. Good job me. I put my face in my hands so I didn’t have to see his reaction.

“About less than a year, you wouldn’t want to be friends with me; I’ll be gone before you know it.” He sounded like he was smiling.

I gasped with my face still in my palms. How is he so calm with the fact that he’s going to die? I looked up. “I’m… sorry Komaeda.”

He smiled and waved off my feelings. “Don’t be, no one will miss me.”

I thought carefully about my next words. “I… I’ll miss you.”

He scowled at me after gasping lightly in surprise. “No you wouldn’t, you don’t even know me Hinata-kun.”

I shook my head. “I don’t have to know you to miss you, even if you were an asshole you still deserve to live.”

He was silent, finally not knowing what to say. He just picked up the bottle and sipped again before looking away from me. I was staring at him, curious as to what he’d do next. Then he looked back and put the bottle down. “You… are one of the most pointless people I have ever met. You should find a purpose before you rot.”

That was something I didn’t expect to hear. I was trying so hard to make this stupid asshole feel better about himself and he still insults me. I felt tears of frustration forming in my eyes. I looked down and pointed in the direction of the front door. “Leave. I’m done.”

He didn’t say anything else as he stood up and walked past me. He didn’t even question it. I stayed where I was until I heard the door open and slowly close. Then I looked up and sighed. 

I felt a weight being lifted off of me. What was his problem? I tried so hard for Nanami, for him. He didn’t even care! I could still see his smirk in my head and it made me angry. I hope I never have to see him again. As soon as I thought that a flash of him saying he was going to die replayed in my head. I shook the thoughts out my brain. “Just because he’s dying doesn’t give him an excuse for being awful.” I said to no one in particular.

I got up and walked into my bedroom and collapsed on the bed. I tried not to think of his sparkly gray eyes and closed my own. Hopefully Nanami won’t be too mad that I kicked him out of my apartment. It was his fault for being how he was being. 

I don’t remember falling asleep but I woke up to a vibrate in my pocket. I sat up and pulled my phone out of my pocket. Of course it was Nanami. I didn’t want to think of what happened earlier so I just placed my phone and my nightstand. Sunlight wasn’t shining through the curtains so I kicked my pants off and removed my shirt. I’m just going to wait and deal with this in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked it!


	3. Unwelcome Guest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright last chapter probably before next weekend! I hope you guys like my story of these lovely boys so far!

I woke up feeling pretty gross; I didn’t take a shower last night. I sat up squinting at my surrounding until my eyes landed on my phone. I felt myself looking at it in disgust. I said I’d deal with it when I woke up, but not until after my shower.

I threw my legs over the side of the bed and stood up. I stretched, picked up my clothes from last night off of the ground, then made my way into the bathroom. After putting my clothes away I heard a thump in my bedroom.

Curiously I walked back and seen my phone on the floor, still buzzing. After picking it up I sighed seeing that Nanami had sent me ten texts from last night to now. I guess I should look at these now then. Opening my phone I was greeted with the last message in all caps. “OKAY MAKE SURE YOU’RE READY.” Confused I scrolled up and read from the top. “Well I guess that didn’t go well.” “We’ll just need to try harder.” “Hinata-kun?” “Are you that mad?” “I tried to talk to Komaeda-kun, but he wouldn’t give me any answers.” “Did he hurt you?” “He did say that you kicked him out.” “Well I’m making you two say sorry and we’re trying again.” “HINATA-KUN IF YOU DON’T REPLY TO THIS IN 15 MINUTES THEN YOU’RE OKAY WITH HIM COMING BACK.” “OKAY MAKE SURE YOU’RE READY.”

I made a disgusted face at my phone and began replying. “No I’m not okay with it don’t bring him here, he’s a jerk.” I shut my phone off and began to start my way back to the bathroom when I was surprised with another buzz of my phone.

This one read: “You didn’t reply soon enough, sorry.” Quickly after I read it another one popped up. “What did he do to you?”

I sat on the edge of the tub and typed my response. “He kept bringing up how I’m useless and boring. I don’t like him.”

The response was almost instant. “Well he’s going to say sorry.”

“I don’t want to talk to him again.”

“I think he’s just playing hard to get.”

I groaned. “Well I don’t want to GET him.”

“I’m sorry but I just need you to try again, please. I know he hurt you, but I think he just doesn’t think he deserves friends so he’s being a jerk.”

I hardly believed she was telling the truth, maybe he does think that way, but if he did then he wouldn’t have even agreed to come here in the first place? It doesn’t make sense. “Fine sure whatever, but if I end up kicking him out again then you never bring him here ever again.”

“Thank you Hinata-kun :)”

I needed to relax before this lunatic showed up.

After my shower and breakfast I settled for watching TV. I couldn’t stop bouncing my leg; I was nervous. I couldn’t focus on the show that was on either. Why does this asshole make me so nervous? I pulled one of my gaming controllers over and started the system. Maybe some games can take my mind off of things. Before I could even hit start there was knocking at my door. I felt myself jump at the noise.

The knocking came again before I realized I needed to open the door. I made my way over carefully and stood in front of the door. Ignoring this seems really good right about now. I shook that thought out of my head and opened the door quite quickly.

Nanami was in the middle of another knock when the door was pulled away from her. She regained her composure and smiled. I could see Komaeda looking away from us behind her. “Good morning Hinata-kun!”

I played with the bottom of my shirt anxiously. “Hey.”

Nanami turned around and motioned for Komaeda to come over. He did but stood awkwardly beside her. 

I gave her a concerned look and she nudged him. He coughed lightly then spoke. “I’m sorry Hinata-kun I was awful yesterday. I hope that you can forgive garbage like me someday.” Nanami looked almost satisfied, but still a little worried.

I didn’t say anything in response, but nodded instead. This is making me feel like I’m in elementary school again, like Nanami is his mom making him apologize for kicking my leg or something.

Nanami coughed awkwardly. “Well, see you guys later. Please be nice to each other. There’s a new game coming out today so I’m going to go get it, message me when you’re ready to leave, Komaeda.” Now she really sounds like a mom. She left without looking back, like something horrible would happen if she did.

Komaeda was looking off to the side again, almost afraid to look at me. Good, I don’t want him to look at me. I turned around and went to sit on the couch. I don’t care if he stands there all day, as long as he doesn’t insult me again. I turned the game console off and put the mindless television back on. 

After about five minutes of me just sitting here I was getting worried, no impatient, let’s go with that. I sighed before speaking. “You can come in y’know.” I didn’t look away from the TV.

I heard soft footsteps until I felt a weight drop onto the couch. I just kept looking at the TV, not really watching it; trying to seem like I didn’t care that he was here.

Surprisingly a whole hour of this went by; I kept glancing at the clock above the TV to be sure. Well at least it’s better than him insulting me. I grabbed the remote and changed the channel to some movie and let that play. Komaeda, unsurprisingly, didn’t protest.

Another hour went by, then a half-an-hour, and then the movie ended. It seemed like Komaeda and I have been having a silence contest, and I had no idea who was going to win. 

The next movie seemed boring so I changed the channel to the one with the animals. The narrator was introducing a litter of puppies to the viewers when I heard the other side of the couch gasp. I glanced over finally acknowledging Komaeda to see what his deal was. He was smiling brightly and looked back at me. “I love dogs.” His excitement was a little cute; I quickly tried to forget that thought.

I tore my gaze from his back to the TV and grunted in response. I kind of liked the silence, and I’d like to keep it that way.

I felt shuffling on the other side of the couch. “Um, Hinata-kun?” I sighed in annoyance. “Where is your bathroom?”

I didn’t look away from the TV and pointed towards the bedroom door.

He got up and shuffled his way over. “This is your bedroom, Hinata-kun, I said bathroom.”

I sighed again, louder this time. “It’s through the bedroom.”

“Oh.” I heard more shuffling, then a door close. This is a lost cause; why did Nanami think that this was a good idea?

A few minutes later the door opened and then the weight was back on the couch. I still kept my gaze towards the screen. “Do you hate me?”

I raised my eyebrow in the same direction I’ve been looking, but didn’t answer.

“I’ll take that as a yes. That’s alright; please do hate me, its better that way.” His voice sounded confident, like he wasn’t berating himself.

I still didn’t answer. I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of feeling sorry for him. Did I actually hate him? Maybe. I did just meet him after all, but he was a jerk. He hasn’t said anything horrible yet today though. However I am still upset.

We continued to watch the puppies in silence for about 15 minutes before I heard the front door open. We both looked over simultaneously to see Nanami. “Hinata-kun you should really lock your door more often.”

I scowled playfully at her. “Damn. You would never have known if you just knocked.” Komaeda must have messaged her at some point while I was ignoring him.

She smiled back to me and her eyes trailed to the marshmallow-head next to me. “I see no one’s dead… that’s good!” 

My smile disappeared and I turned back to the TV. I felt the lump on the couch next to me get up. “Thank you for having me, Hinata-kun.”

Once again I responded to him by grunting and crossing my arms stubbornly. 

I heard Nanami sigh and a little giggle from the other one. I also heard a small whisper of “He hates me.”

I narrowed my eyes at the TV and I felt my grip tighten.

“Bye Hinata-kun!”

“Bye Nanami.”

Then the door shut. I felt my body relax. These two are going to kill me someday. The clock above the TV said 1:54. I sat up and went to look for something to eat.

I spent the rest of the day grumbling to myself about the fluffy-haired boy. I wish he was ugly so I could hate him even more. Too bad he’s really… pleasing to the eye. I groaned and got up from my spot at my desk then proceeded to flop on the bed. Here’s to another day of wasting my time. I repeated my bed ritual of kicking almost all of my clothes off before passing out.

I woke up with a whine. “What the hell?” I said groggily. There was a noise coming from outside the door. I immediately woke up, fearing for my life. 

Nanami was right; I should lock my door while I’m here. I’m going to die because I didn’t take her advice. I looked around and found that I had nothing I could use as a weapon. I’m going to die. I slowly crept out of my bed standing shakily. I’m going to die here; I looked over to my alarm clock, at 2:34 AM. I reached over to my phone and grabbed it quietly. I need to call the police. The footsteps were getting closer. I instinctively backed away from it and my back hit the bathroom door. It’s too late; they’ll kill me before they get here. I heard the door knob turn. I slid to the floor and put my hands in my face, like I’m a kid hiding from the monsters in the closet. I look pathetic and I’m going to die here, alone.

I couldn’t see anything with my face in my hands but I heard the door open. I’m going to die. I’m going to die. I’m going to die. I heard the footsteps coming closer. I’m going to die. I could almost feel their energy irradiating off of them, they’re right in front of me. I’m going to die. I guess the hide my face defense thing didn’t work, they still found me. I’m going to die. I’m going to-

I felt my thoughts get cut off as two cold hands grabbed my wrists and pulled them away from my face. I refused to open my eyes. I feel like I’m going to throw up, or have a heart attack. Then I heard a quiet giggle. “I’m glad you’re awake, Hinata-kun.” 

I opened my eyes and immediately knew who it was. “K-Komaeda? What are you d-doing in my r-room?” He’s going to kill me. Why is he here? To kill me, probably. He hates me; I’m still going to die tonight. He was holding my wrists gently in his hands while crouching inches away from my face. He smelled like cherries.

His smile dropped and he looked concerned. “Why are you nervous?”

I sputtered and scrunched my face at the absurdness of what he just said to me. “You broke into my apartment! I know we have our d-differences but you don’t need to do this.” I tried to back myself further into the door, like it would magically let me through. But he was still holding my wrists.

He cocked his head to the side, still looking a bit concerned. “No I didn’t, you’re door is open.” He paused. “And what do you mean by not needing to do this? What am I doing?”

Before I could think I said. “Y-you’re not going to kill me?”

He looked at me with wide eyes before smiling again. “Of course not, why would I kill you?”

“You broke into my apartment!”

“It was unlocked.”

“Doesn’t matter! It’s two in the morning! What are you doing here?”

He finally took his hands off of me and his smile looked softer, more fond than amused. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH! I hope it isn't too much of a cliff hanger! I'm sorry for leaving it there.


	4. I'm glad too.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Komaeda and Hinata have a sleepover, sort of, not really.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hooray for the weekend! Here's a chapter to start it right.

I don’t know why but it felt like my chest kind of hurt when he said that. My face also felt warm. “W-what?”

Komaeda smiled a little wider and placed his hands on the floor to stabilize himself. “I said that I couldn’t stop thinking about you, Hinata-kun.”

This was a little confusing and it felt super weird to hear him say that, like I was going to have a heart attack, or maybe that’s from the leftover fear. “Why…? Didn’t you say that I was boring like five times? Doesn’t that make me forgettable?” My voice sounded higher than normal.

He looked off to the side; I’ve noticed he does that a lot. His grin fell slowly. “That’s precisely one of the reasons that you’ve been in my mind. You’ve made me think in a way that I have never thought before, and you… I don’t even know what to say about you. You are one of the first people to tell me that I was… worth something since… maybe since I was born. I’m not saying you’re right, I truly am worthless, but the way you said those things about me…” He spoke with such passion, but I couldn’t even remember what he was talking about. He looked back in my direction and it almost looked like he was blushing, but it was too dark to tell.

“Komaeda, the only thing I remember is calling you an asshole.” I didn’t mean to sound so blunt, but it was two-something in the morning and I didn’t appreciate almost dying from fear. 

He shook his head, letting his fluffy hair bounce in different directions. “You said that I deserved to live.”

I laughed softly to myself at the absurdity of that. “Komaeda everyone deserves to live, not just you. Sorry to burst your bubble.”

“But I never thought I did. Hinata-kun, I still don’t but I just want to know why you think I do.” He grabbed my wrists again during his monologue, making me jump again.

“Can you maybe not just grab me like that?” I spoke sharply. “And of course you deserve to live, why wouldn’t you?” I just wanted to go back to bed, please let him be satisfied and leave so I can lock my door.

He cocked his head to the side and his face showed confusion. “I’m garbage, and a waste of space, and horrible, and disgusting, and I’m going to die anyway because that’s what people like me deserve. And if you think differently I’d like to know why.” He then slowly released my hands.

I groaned, this was going nowhere. “Couldn’t you wait until tomorrow to do this? I don’t know what you amazing students do, but normal people sleep at this hour.”

He giggled. “I just said how awful I was and you still called me amazing; you sure are strange, Hinata-kun.”

I groaned louder this time and pinched the bridge of my nose in annoyance. “Can you just go home? I’m tired.”

He got up without protest, but stayed still. I stood up with him and crossed my arms, waiting for him to go. After a few seconds passed I sighed, “What?”

“I don’t really want to go home, do you mind if I wait for you to wake up?” He asked already walking over and pulling out my desk chair.

I sputtered and moved my hands wildly at this stupid shit. “No! Go home! You’re not watching me sleep! That’s creepy!”

He stopped midair above the seat. “Can I wait for you in the living room then?”

I moaned loudly in frustration. “Fine, what the fuck ever. Don’t steal anything. Don’t come in here. Pee out of the window. And if you feel the sudden urge to, I don’t know, go home feel free.” I sat on my bed and made a shooing motion with my hands.

He smiled and walked over to the door and grabbed the handle. “Thank you Hinata-kun, sorry for being a bother in your house.” Then he walked out of the room, shutting the door with him.

I flopped back onto the bed and then it hit me. I just let this lunatic run free through my apartment while I sleep. Tired me is an idiot. I’m just going to deal with this in the morning. Weird the last time I said that I was also talking about the white-haired weirdo. 

Surprisingly I had fallen asleep fast. When I woke up I forgot about Komaeda until I walked out of my room. I jumped at the sight of the boy on the couch, I don’t know why since he doesn’t look threatening in any way right now. His shoes were placed beside the couch and he seemed to have taken off his jacket and used it as a blanket. He was lying down and had his eyes closed. I let out a sigh of relief. I walked back into my room and put some jeans and a T-shirt on.

When I made my way back out I tiptoed past him and opened the fridge to see I was out of orange juice. Gross, I have to go to the store. I grimaced at the thought. I closed the fridge and looked back at Komaeda. I’m kind of embarrassed that he’s seen me in nothing but boxers, but it’s not like I asked him to come over at two in the morning. 

I made my way over to him carefully. He looked… ugh. He looked really cute okay. I said it. There we go, I admitted it. He is cute. Doesn’t make him any less of a nut job though. I guess I’m not really mad at him anymore. Don’t get me wrong I’m pissed that he woke me up so early and for him saying horrible stuff to me, but I don’t hate him. 

I inched closer to him and poked him in the arm gently. When he didn’t move I poked him again. After that also did nothing I shoved him a bit. Holy shit is he dead? No, he can’t be dead. I shoved him once more, nothing. Did his illness get to him? Did he die on my goddamned couch? I can’t afford a new couch! I don’t want him to die, especially in my house. I grabbed a bit of his hair, ignoring how amazingly soft it felt and yanked it harder than I intended.

He finally groaned and looked up at me. “Hinata-kun? Ow what are you…?” I released his hair as soon as I heard him speak.

“I’m sorry! I thought you might have died!” I backed away a bit, putting my hands up defensively.

He sat up, smiled awkwardly, and then rubbed the spot where I pulled. “It’s alright I’m a deep sleeper.” He bundled his jacket up in his hands and patted the spot next to him for me to sit down.

I did just that, but cautiously and kind of eyeing him suspiciously. After a few seconds of me glaring at him and him smiling I sighed in defeat and turned to face the TV. “Do you… wanna watch anything?”

He shrugged. “I’ll do anything to make you happy, Hinata-kun.”

I raised my eyebrow questioningly at him but didn’t ask about what he said. Instead I grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. 

“Does Nanami know you’re here?” I asked curiously. If she did I was going to kick her ass for letting him come over so late.

He shook his head ‘no’.

I nodded, accepting his answer and turned my attention to the TV.

After a few minutes I heard Komaeda sigh. “Hinata-kun?” I turned my head and gave him a blank stare. “I’m sorry; I really mean it this time, for waking you up, and for saying things that you seem to be sensitive about. I promise I won’t do it again.” I gave him another confused look. “What I’m saying is, we should try to be friends, and I completely understand if you don’t want to be friends with someone like me, I am walking garbage and all.”

I was kind of speechless. “Why?” Was all I could manage to say.

He just kind of shrugged. “I can just kind of… feel the hope within you. I want to understand how you think and feel. I want someone to… like me.” He then held out his hand to me, silently asking me to take his offer. “Like I said though, I am a waste of-“

Before he could continue I took his hand into mine and just held it there, I didn’t know if I should shake it or… This is awkward. Then he closed his hand around mine and we just stayed like that for what felt like years, but were probably more like seconds. I took mine off of his and turned my attention back to the neglected TV. I could feel the blush rise to my cheeks. His hands were really warm, unlike last night.

I heard a small chuckle from the other side of the couch. “Are we friends now, Hinata-kun?”

I hid my face in the hand that I had leaning on the arm of the couch and just nodded. For some reason my pride wasn’t letting me say anything to him. However I actually felt a little excited at the thought of being friends with him.

“I’m actually happy to be friends with you, I feel hopeful. I’ve never had a friend before.” I glanced over to the boy to see him grinning, I could see his teeth. 

I smiled back at him. “Just don’t come to my house while I’m asleep again please.”

He narrowed his eyes at me in a teasing manor. “Hinata-kun, that’s the first time I have ever seen you smile. It’s beautiful.” I choked on nothing in surprise as my blush returned once again. He laughed again. 

“Don’t say stuff like that!” I scolded.

He looked away and his smile dropped. “I need to tell you something.”

I felt my smile drop too. “Is everything okay?” 

He looked down to the floor. “Yes, and that’s the problem; I need to tell you now before you get mad at me later.”

I didn’t say anything, but waited for him to speak.

Komaeda took a deep breath. “I’m not going to die in a year; I’m not going to die in less than a year. I’m fine now, my lymphoma has depleted and my dementia was a misdiagnosis for a lump on my brain, which has also gone down.” He looked over at me nervously.

I shot him a confused glance. “Am I supposed to be upset over that? That’s actually amazing. No wonder they call you lucky.”

He also looked confused. “I lied to you, and everybody. I’m not going to die.”

I shook my head. “Yeah that’s pretty lame of you, but it’s not a deal-breaker. Why did you lie anyway?”

He sighed, in relief or stress, I couldn’t tell. “I didn’t want friends; bad things could happen to them. If they thought I would die soon, then they wouldn’t want to be friends so they wouldn’t have to grieve.”

I was still kind of confused. “The bad luck, good luck, thing right?”

He nodded and smiled, seemingly happy that I remembered something about him.

“Then why be friends with me?”

He looked off to the side once more. “I can’t tell you, I made a promise.”

I glared at him. “What promise?”

“To you.” He refused to look over to me.

I thought for a second. “You mean it’s going to insult me?”

He finally looked at me but didn’t say anything. I’m going to take that as a yes. I thought a little more and then it hit me. “It’s because I’m boring isn’t it?”

He looked away again. 

I sighed and turned my line of sight back to the TV. “It’s fine, nothing I didn’t know anyway.”

We watched in silence for a few moments once more. “Komaeda.” I waited a few moments before continuing, still not looking at him. I could already feel my face heat up again. “I… I’m glad we’re friends too.” I meant it.


	5. Mail's here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mailman comes by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys it's me again with another chapter! HOPE you enjoy it. Ba-dum-tss.

It’s been a little while after Komaeda and I became friends, about two weeks or so, spring break in ending in about a week. Today is maybe the seventh day he’s coming over to my apartment since he broke… sorry walked into my apartment while I was asleep, he really likes coming over for some reason. We have constantly been talking through text though, including a group chat with me, him, and Nanami. I always look forward to his messages. Today we just came back from eating breakfast at a waffle house with Nanami. She said that she’s very proud of us for being friends, but she still insists on leaving us alone for some reason. Also I learned that Komaeda doesn’t like sweets, which is a crime.

Komaeda hopped his way up all the way to the third floor of my apartment building, the top floor before the roof, and his white tufts of hair were bouncing with him. They really need to invest in an elevator; I still get winded after the second flight of stairs. Komaeda however seemed like it didn’t affect him at all. “Hinata-kun, you’d think you would be used to these stairs by now.” The boy giggled a few steps ahead of me.

I moaned in annoyance. “Shut up, sorry I don’t have super high school level stamina.”

He turned around at the top of the stairs and smirked at me while putting his hands behind his back. “That talent would certainly come in handy in a lot of situations, huh?” His voice had a playful tone to it.

I made my way to the top of the stairs and punched him in the shoulder lightly. “Shut up, you perv.”

He cocked his head in mock innocence. “What do you mean, Hinata-kun?”

I glared at him before walking past him. He knows damn well what I mean. Despite the weird comments he makes sometimes, he’s actually really fun to talk to. He has also kept his little promises so far, even though I know he probably complains about me being boring all the time inside his head. 

I heard the soft footsteps behind me as I approached my door. There was a letter sticking out of my mailbox. I grabbed it nonchalantly and unlocked the door. I’ve been locking my door ever since the ‘incident’. 

After we made our way inside I closed the door behind my new friend. “Hinata-kun, what’s that?”

I looked at him then down to the envelope; it had the symbol of Hope’s Peak on it with bright red letters reading ‘classified’. Huh, didn’t notice that outside. I shrugged at his question and began tearing at the seal. 

Komaeda remained silent yet intrigued as I took out the paper and read it to myself. 

The letter read, “CONGRATULATIONS! Mr. Hajime Hinata you have been chosen to be in our latest hopeful endeavor! You have been noticed as a spectacular student in our reserve course portion of Hope’s Peak Academy. With this honor we would like to offer you a chance to enroll in our main course. However to do this you will need to accept to allow us the chance to give you talents, not one, not two, but every talent! You have the opportunity to be a part of the Izuru Kamukura Project, named after our school’s founder. In this project you will allow us to do minor neurosurgery, hardly noticeable, from the best neurosurgeons from around the world. No risk involved! You’ll hardly notice anything different other than the amazing gift of talent that we have given you! You will be deemed the hope of mankind. If you accept our offer, which will only be offered to you, then please come down to the Steering Committee building at the esteemed Hope’s Peak Academy. The due date for this offer is the day before classes start again. DO NOT MENTION THIS TO ANYONE.  
-Jin Kirigiri, headmaster of Hope’s Peak Academy “

I went wide-eyed at the letter and I smiled widely. A talent? No, many talents! An opportunity to go to my dream school! I started jumping and laughing. I ran to the confused Komaeda and grabbed his arm. “I can’t believe it! Is this a joke? No it can’t be his signature’s right there! Ha-ha!” I danced around swinging Komaeda with me before he stopped me. 

“What’s going on Hinata-kun?” He sounded concerned, but he was smiling, happy that I was happy.

I didn’t even know, I just know that I’m going to the REAL Hope’s Peak and I’m going to mean something, I won’t be a waste of space anymore, I could be proud to be around my talented friends. “I-I’m not supposed to show you this… but if you promise not to tell anyone I’ll let you read it!” I was too excited not to tell someone.

He nodded in acceptance and I handed the neatly folded paper over to him. He opened it again and read silently while I was still bouncing. His eyes lit up, but as he continued to read he looked more and more concerned. I stopped bouncing from his expression. “What’s wrong?”

He handed the paper back to me and folded his arms. “You want to do this, huh?”

I smiled again and nodded. “Of course! Aren’t you happy for me? I can go to class with you and Nanami!”

He nodded, but didn’t smile like he usually does. “It’s just… I believe in the hope of that school I really do, but doesn’t this sound odd? ‘Don’t tell anyone’, ‘minor neurosurgery’, I’ve had neurosurgery and I have never heard of ‘minor’ neurosurgery.”

I smirked at him. “Oh, are you jealous, Komaeda? All those talents in one body is pretty amazing.” I couldn’t understand how he wasn’t as excited as me. 

He shook his head while looking down. “I’m sorry if I seem selfish, but I just made a new friend and this seems a little dangerous. My luck cycle will most definitely interfere with this.” 

I scowled at him. He was being selfish. I really want this; this is my only chance to matter. “I’ll do anything to have a talent Komaeda, the mention of surgery and bad luck isn’t going to scare me.”

He became looking increasingly worried. “I have never heard of the school doing any projects like this. It could be a trap.”

I laughed. “A trap? Really? Why would anyone plan against me? I’m nothing, but not anymore, I’m going to become something.”

“Hinata-kun, you shouldn’t do this, let someone else-“

“Why are you trying to hold me back? To laugh at me? To watch me suffer? I thought you were supposed to be my friend.” I felt tears in my eyes, this day was supposed to be amazing because of the letter, but Komaeda was ruining it.

“I am your friend and that’s why I don’t want you to do anything dangerous. This looks really dangerous and I have a bad feeling about it.” He walked closer to me slowly, like he was going to scare me off like a wild animal. 

I backed up a little and hit the counter in the kitchen. “Just pretend like you’ve never read it.”

He continued forward until he was inches away from me. “You don’t need a talent to be amazing, Hinata-kun.”

I actually felt the tears leaving my eyes. “Shut up! You know I’m worthless!” I was practically shrieking at him. I felt horrible; he’s even lying to me now.

Komaeda reached out and gently tugged at the sleeve of my shirt, trying to pull me closer to him. “No you’re not. You’ve shown me that anyone could matter, you yourself even said that I matter, and I still hate how awful I am, but I actually want to keep moving forward, for you.” He smiled as he spoke softly.

I gave in and let him pull me in. He wrapped his arms around my middle and let his head rest on my shoulder.

I silently let the tears fall as I dug my face into his shoulder. After a few seconds I reached my arms up around him as well. This is the first time that I’ve hugged someone in a while.

“This is the first time someone has ever touched me like this.” I heard him whisper in my ear. “It feels amazing, like the hope you give me, Hinata-kun” I shivered a bit at his words and the warm breath against me.

I’m not going to describe the awkward 'us pulling away from the hug' part, but I will say it did feel comforting. I’m still going to accept the project, but it’s nice to know how much Komaeda cares about me. If he wasn’t lying of course. 

The next few hours were the usual, video games and ordering delivery food. We didn’t mention the letter again for the rest of his time here. At least until he was about to leave.

“You should tell Nanami-san.”

“No, I shouldn’t have even told you.” I change my mind; I don’t like it when Komaeda cares.

Marshmallow-head looked down and paused before looking back up. “Just take some time okay? Think about it for a few days.”

I looked away from him and crossed my arms stubbornly like I always do around him. “Fine.”

He lifted his hand and ruffled my hair a bit. I winced at the sudden contact and he pulled back. “Sorry, I seen that in a movie once and thought it’s what friends do. I forgot that I wasn’t good enough to touch you.”

I smiled looking up at him; I hate the height difference a little more each day. “Shut up, and go home.”

He returned my smile and waved. “Bye Hinata-kun.”

I waved back. “Bye Komaeda.” 

Then I shut the door and wondered back to the couch. What was there to think about? I get a talent, go to an awesome school, and get to see my friends every day, sounds pretty good if you ask me. The letter even said ‘no risk involved’. Why does Komaeda worry so much anyway? If he has such good luck then nothing bad should happen to me, and even if something bad happened then something even better will happen to him. It should be a win-win in his eyes.

I thought about Nanami then. Would she be just as worried or happy for me? Knowing her probably also worried, she always acts like my mom. Speaking of my mom, would my parents approve? They’d probably be so proud of me for having at least one talent.

Brain surgery did sound a little nerve-wracking though. However the best neurosurgeons in the country, no, the world would be working on me so there should be no problem at all. I wonder if I can fit all of those talents in my brain. If they believe that someone like me can, then I can’t let them down. 

I think Komaeda is just worrying over nothing. Hope’s Peak Academy would never have bad intentions for their students.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah jeez here we go. Buckle your seat belts kids its gonna be an emotional roller coaster from here. I hate college for stealing away my energy and creativity.


	6. The decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata makes his choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Probably my favorite chapter so far! I hope you like it too!

It’s been two days. Two days since the letter came in the mail, four days left to decide. I’m in my apartment like always, Nanami is here and playing games with me on my old console. Komaeda isn’t here; he’s actually been pretty quiet in these two days, only shooting me a few texts here and there. I hope he isn’t upset with me for snapping at him. He doesn’t seem like the type to get upset easily. 

Once again Nanami beat me, and once again I compliment her skills and she shrugs it off. She gets up and turns off the console, weird we usually game more than this. When Nanami turns around she flashed me a smile I hardly ever see on her. “Hinata-kun, I’m sorry for interrupting our gaming, but I just want to talk about how amazing it is that you and Komaeda are together.”

I laughed a little at her excitement. “Don’t say it like that, we’re not gay or anything.” Well technically I was bisexual, but I had no clue what Komaeda was. Would I want to ever date Komaeda? I’ve never thought about it and I don’t really plan on it either, I’m more focused on trying to get into the main course. I guess I don’t really have to worry about that anymore though.

She giggled with me. “You’re ruining my fantasy, Hinata-kun.”

I laughed even harder. “This isn’t one of your dating sims.”

Once we settled down she was still smiling. “Aren’t you glad that I helped you make a new friend though?”

“I don’t know him very well yet so I’m not thanking you until he changes my life or something.” I said leaning back into the couch and folding my arms over my head.

“What do you mean by that…? Like dating? That would be really… cute.” She joked while poking my cheek.

I groaned and untangled my arm to swat her hand away from my face. “No, dummy stop it.”

She retracted her hand and her smile went from playful to content. “But seriously he seems so much happier lately.” I nodded kind of feeling proud at him noticeably changing his mood because of me. I think I’ve been happier too, and I think his luck rubbed off on me thanks to the letter! “He’s even picked up a new hobby.”

I perked up curiously and smiled. “Really? He’s never mentioned a new hobby to me. How do you even see him every day?”

“Yeah he didn’t tell us either but he has seemed to have picked up on researching history. And the main course students live in dorms on the school grounds.” She said also curious.

“History? Sounds kind of boring.” I never did great in history class. I didn’t even know that lived there; no wonder Komaeda and Nanami are so close to my apartment.

“Boring to you maybe. Yeah he’s been going around asking about the past projects of Hope’s Peak.”

My eyes went wide. He’s doing what? “Huh?”

She looked confused at my expression but continued. “It’s a little weird though; he isn’t asking the right people to get that kind of information.”

“What kind of people is he talking to?” I was kind of scared of where this was going. Is he trying to sabotage my chances?

“Um… He’s talking to people like the SHSL neurologist, the SHSL analyst, even the SHSL soldier. I told him he should just ask the teachers, but he said that they probably wouldn’t know anything. His thought process doesn’t make much sense, in a dating sim he’d be pretty hard to figure out… Hinata-kun, are you alright?” She expressed concern at how tense I was, and my breathing was abnormal.

“…Can I tell you something and can you promise not to tell anyone?” I can’t believe I’m doing this for the second time this week, the letter said don’t, but I’m doing it again.

She nodded and pulled a straight face.

After she read the letter she expressed similar concerns that Komaeda had about the wording. “This doesn’t seem right.”

I sighed impatiently. “Komaeda is sneaking around and he’s probably going to ruin my chance at doing this!” I was upset and Nanami could see that, it seemed like she was using more caution towards me than Komaeda did.

“You don’t need to do this to be someone worth knowing, Hinata-kun.” She stood about a foot away from me and grabbed my hand and held it softly. “Please don’t feel like you don’t mean something to me, and to Komaeda, he’s only worried about you, you’re his only friend other than me, and he doesn’t even count me as his friend.”

For some reason I felt less awful than when Komaeda was telling me this, maybe because I’ve already heard it before. “I don’t know Nanami, if I turn this down then I’d be turning down my dream.”

She took her hand away from mine and used both of them to cup my cheeks. “How about you go to their office and ask them for some more information? I would give me some peace of mind, and probably Komaeda too.” When she was done talking she removed her hands and placed them back on my face resulting in a gentle smack before pulling away.

I smiled at her suggestion. “Why are you so smart?”

She shrugged. “Trivia games.”

The very next day I dressed in a nice white shirt and even put on a tie. I’m going to meet with Jin Kirigiri today and I’m a bit nervous. I’ve never spoken to him before. I didn’t tell Komaeda about my plan, but he’ll be pleasantly surprised to know that I’ve talked with the head of the project; at least I think he’s the head of the project.

Soon enough I was in front of the building I was supposed to give my final decision in. I was even more nervous then when I was getting ready. When I finally shook my way forward to go through the door I found that I couldn’t move, something was holding the back of my shirt. I gasped and looked over my shoulder to see my new friend looking desperate.

“Hinata-kun, please don’t! Don’t do it. They aren’t being truthful to you!” He spat out sounding like he was out of breath. His grip tightened.

“Komaeda, calm down! Jeez you’re really good at scaring me. I’m just going to ask some questions about the project, no worries.” I tried to give him a reassuring smile, but I was so nervous that it probably looked forced.

He shook his head quickly and tugged hard at my shirt until I fell against him. He wrapped his arms around my waist. “Please, just decline. Someone I know, his name is Matsuda-kun and he’s the SHSL neurologist. He said it wasn’t possible to give someone every talent.”

I was surprised at the hug, or more of him keeping me in place. What he said was just making me agitated, does nothing make him happy? However if he was telling the truth then I don’t know what I’d do. I struggled a bit in his grasp; he was stronger than he looked. “Komaeda what are you talking about let me go! They can probably see this in there, they might not accept me is they see this embarrassing scene.”

He didn’t budge. “I know it’s embarrassing to be seen with me, but listen. Matsuda-kun said that there isn’t enough room in the brain for all of those talents; they’d be hurting you, Hinata-kun.”

I finally squirmed my way out of his death grip and hopped about a foot away from him. “You know I’d do anything for a talent, you can’t convince me not to do this! Why do you even care? You just met me like two weeks ago!”

He grunted and his hands went up and grabbed violently at his hair. I winced at the sight, is he okay? “I love you, Hinata-kun!” My jaw dropped. “No no no no no, I worded it wrong, I love the way you make me feel. The hope is just… so ugh! I…”He started panting and pulling at his hair.

I forgot what the hell we were talking about and I moved over and grabbed at his arms, but they wouldn’t move. “Hey… calm down. Please stop, oh god I don’t know what to do here.” He paused his scalping at looked down at me with his mouth slightly open. I didn’t know what to do so I just gently tugged at his arms until he gave up and let me have them. I moved my hand down and grabbed his hands and just held them. I looked up to see his cheeks tinted in a light pink. This looks really gay.

He smiled softly. “Thank you Hinata-kun, I don’t know what happened there.”

I just nodded and we stood there for a few moments until I remembered why I was here. I let go of his hands and looked towards the door behind me. “I really need to talk to them.”

He looked almost disappointed and dropped his head. He was letting me go. I suddenly felt guilty. Why did he have to do this to me? “H-hey I’ll be back, okay?” He didn’t move.

I sighed and turned around and made my way into the building. I told the receptionist who I was and made me wait on one of the very comfortable couches. I need one of these in the apartment.

I waited for what seemed like hours until someone came and got me. I was lead into a room in the back, it was kind of dark, and the lights must be very dim. There were portraits and plants scattered around to decorate the room and the carpet looked spotless. I sat in the chair in front of the desk. No one was sitting across from me but I was told that Mr. Kirigiri would be in shortly. Then there was more waiting. I was becoming more anxious with every minute.

The he walked in. I almost got up to bow, but I thought against it. “Hello, Mr. Hinata” He stood tall and smiled at my stiff form in the chair.

I was still for a moment before regaining my belongings. “H-hello sir.”

“Are you here to discuss the Izuru Kamukura project?” His smile dropped but his tone remained the same.

I nodded. “Yes sir.”

He walked around and took a seat in the desk in front of me. “Very good, do you accept?” He was to the point but looked off in a way; I’d almost say he looked worried.

I stuttered out my response and immediately felt embarrassed. “H-hang on! C-can we talk about this first?”

He looked genuinely surprised, but composed himself quickly. “Oh yes of course. How rude of me to assume that you didn’t have any questions.” He seemed less intimidating than I expected. “Go on then.”

I straightened myself up. “What do you mean by ‘minor neurosurgery’?” That was the biggest question I had on my mind. 

He looked off to the side, looking the same way he did when he asked me about accepting. “In order to provide you with all of the talent you desire we need to examine your brain a bit, to determine if you can learn.” His voice sounded off, different than before. 

I nodded, but still not satisfied, I must seem so dumb. “But I heard that the brain doesn’t have enough room for all of those talents.” God why did I say that?

He looked surprised again, and he didn’t hide it this time. “Where did you hear that?”

I panicked for a moment. “Uh… I’ve taken psychology.” I hope he buys it. I wasn’t going to snitch on Komaeda. Snitches get stitches. 

It was his turn to look panicked, what is his problem? You’d think the Headmaster of the school would be a bit more level-headed. He sighed. “You remind me of myself when I was younger.” He said suddenly.

I cocked my head at him. This didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. “How? I’m talentless.”

He laughed quietly. “Do you know what my talent is?”

I shook my head. I can’t believe I don’t know his talent! He’s the headmaster of Hope’s Peak! I’m going to look so ignorant. 

“I was destined to be a detective like the rest of my family, but I chose not to. Instead I have taken interests here and built my way up to where I am now. I guess you could say I have no talent.” He smiled sympathetically, like he knew how worthless I felt.

I felt my mouth fall open. “No, you can’t be like… me.”

He nodded. “I am.”

“But you’re successful.”

“There are millions of people who are successful without an extraordinary talent.” He smiled like he accomplished something.

Is he trying to get me to decline? “Sir? Do you not want me to take this opportunity?” I was so confused at his reasoning behind telling me this. 

His smile dropped. “You can choose whatever you want. Just know that if you decline we can pretend this meeting never happened and I can pretend that I lost interest in the project.” He stood up and walked to the door and held it open. “Do you accept our offer?” He smiled gesturing to the open doorway. He didn’t want me to do this, I don’t know what he was trying to imply, but I know it’s not good.

I stood up and walked to the door. I reached my hand out for him to shake. He looked disappointed, but took my hand anyway. “I’m sorry sir, but I don’t think this project is right for me.”

He beamed and shook my hand before dropping his expression. “I’m sorry to hear that, hopefully you may change your mind.” He said in mock sadness. He bent down and leaned into my ear. “You chose the right decision. Continue making the right choices.” He said so softly I almost didn’t catch all of it.

He released my hand and walked into the office and closed the door, leaving me dumbfounded. I also felt giddy; the headmaster of Hope’s Peak Academy wants me to keep a secret! I smiled excitedly to myself and walked down the hallway to the way I came. 

For some reason I didn’t feel so worthless anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love thinking that Jin is really a nice guy and felt horrible during the project. I also like thinking that he was secretly against all of the secret bullshit that Hope's Peak does.


	7. Don't let me down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you shit college for taking time away from writing about stuff I care about, like fanfiction.

When I exited the building it was getting late, but not too late. The sun was setting and I felt like it symbolized how my opportunity to get into the main course has ended, or it would if my life was a shitty book. I sighed in agitation. I was happy, but also not. I feel like if I have never met Komaeda I would have accepted.

I looked up suddenly. That was a weird thought. I shook it out of my head quickly. Komaeda has nothing to do with my personal decision, sure he was concerned, but ultimately it was my choice in the end. Speaking of the fluffy haired boy I looked around my surroundings to see if he might have been waiting for me somewhere. I was disappointed to not find him. I need to tell him what I chose.

I sat down on a bench near the building that overlooked a big fountain. It was beautiful in the sunset. Reaching in my pocket I pulled out my phone. I wanted to surprise Komaeda so I messaged Nanami.

“Hey, guess what?” I sent. I waited for a few minutes before getting a response.

“Did you talk to the project people?”

“Yeah I declined.” I felt the disappointment again, but I kept my spirits up.

“Why?”

“It felt kind of sketchy.” I was only partially lying.

“Well I’m relieved you said no, I wouldn’t know what to do if I lost you.”

I blushed in embarrassment. “I’d feel the same way about you. Never change, baby.” I love Nanami; she’s one of my best friends. Have I ever thought about dating her? Of course. 

I had a crush on Nanami two years ago, but as time went on our relationship kind of turned to more of a brother-sister kind of thing. Well I might have embarrassed myself by writing some sort of love letter to her and she found it. I wasn’t going to give it to her, but she seen it on my desk when she was about to go to the bathroom. It was the most red my face has ever been. She told me she really liked me, but more as her family than a boyfriend. I felt so worthless after that. Then she promised to forget about it. It took me a while to lessen my crush on her, but now I’ve stopped taking it personally and see her as my family as well. 

“-_- Who are you again? lol” 

I smiled at the change of atmosphere. “Hajime Hinata, nice to meet you.”

“Shut up.”

“lol Hey do your know where Komaeda might be now? I want to tell him.”

“Probably the library, he’s always there if he’s not with us.”

“Thank you.”

I shut my phone off and stood up. Giving one last look to the building where I turned down the biggest offer I have ever gotten I turned around and made my way across the school yard. 

Once I found myself at the library I input my student ID number to access it. The library was closed right now, but there was a section open only to students who needed a place to study. When the red on the keypad turned green I went through the door to continue my search for my friend. 

The building was dark except the portion next to the door that had a calm orange glow from the lights. There was next to no students in there due to spring break, but in the corner I could see a familiar cloud of white. He was wearing his green jacket like always.

I bounced my way over to that corner and stood in front of the reading boy. He didn’t notice me, or he was pretending not to. I held my hands behind my back and smiled. “Ko-mae-da!” I sang playfully. Despite what happened earlier I was in a good mood.

He looked up from the book with a startled expression. “Hinata-kun?”

“That’s me.” I said holding my positive expression. 

He continued to look surprised and eyed me up and down. “What are you doing here?”

My smile fell. “Visiting you, you jerk.”

He looked panicked. “Oh no, I’m not upset that you’re here! I’m sorry, Hinata-kun. I really am trash.”

I rolled my eyes and raised the edges of my mouth once again. “No you’re not. I was joking, calm down.”

He sighed in relief and smiled with me. “I’m happy you’re here.” He patted the spot next to him for me to sit down. 

I did and rested my head on my hands. Glancing over to his book, I raised an eyebrow. “What are you reading?” 

He smiled a little wider. “Just some historical fiction.” His smiled suddenly dropped and he looked over to me. “How was your meeting?”

At this I held my expression neutral. I debated messing with him, but I figured that would be too cruel. “It was… weird.”

His eyes sunk. “Oh… what did you ask?” I’ve never heard him sound so defeated before. I didn’t know he was this worried about it. 

I smiled, but it probably looked strained because I was a bit worried about his sudden mood change. “It doesn’t really matter. I didn’t accept.”

It took a few seconds for him to process what I said, but then Komaeda’s eyes widened at me and his mouth fell open. “What do you mean?”

I laughed quietly. “I said no, not interested, denied, turned them down.” Despite how bad it felt to say it, I still smiled, knowing Komaeda would too.

And that’s exactly what he did. He smiled and let out a large breath he must have been holding in. However he stayed quiet for a little while. He put his head in his hand, mimicking my posture and held out his unoccupied hand. 

I was a little confused at the gesture. I gave him my hand; his grin grew and he interlinked our fingers and just held it there admiring his work. His hands were so soft, I kind of secretly liked it when he did this little gesture of affection, but I’d never tell anyone that. I raised my eyebrow at him, but remained smiling. What a weird guy. “I’m selfish.” He murmured. “So selfish.”

I frowned at his statement. “Why are you selfish?”

His eyes were a little cloudy as he kept his grin up. “I just never want you to leave me, Hinata-kun. Am I keeping you back? You shouldn’t let horrible people tell you what to do.”

I shook my head and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. “You’re not holding me back. Millions of people without talent can become successful…” I gulped for an unknown reason. “I don’t want you to leave me either, Komaeda.”

His grin fell, but soon came back, much lighter this time though. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a fragment of hope, until I met you.”

I didn’t respond and just took my head off of my hand and stood up. I had to release Komaeda’s hand in this process as well. I never really know how to respond to Komaeda when he mentions hope; he’s always giving mixed reactions to it so I tend to leave it alone.

I stood still for a few seconds debating whether or not I should ask Komaeda if he wants to come home with me. Oh god not like that. He doesn’t look busy, but he’s acting a little strange tonight. “Hinata-kun are you alright?” 

I nodded slowly. “Hey do you want to like… come have a sleepover or something? Y’know like friends do.” I had no clue why I was suddenly nervous around Komaeda. Maybe it was his weird love confession earlier, he didn’t mean it though, and he even said it himself.

He shut his book and nodded.

When we arrived at my apartment I was once again tired from the walk up the steps. “Gee Hinata-kun you’d think you’d be used to these steps by now.” Komaeda joked.

I groaned. “Gee Hinata-kun you’d think blah blah bluh. You already made that joke.” I mocked him and he just giggled like usual and laid his coat on the back of one of my chairs.

While Komaeda settled himself on the couch I went to the bedroom and got some boxers and a pair of sweatpants out of my dresser. “Komaeda I’m going to get a shower don’t burn my apartment down.”

I could hear his soft giggle from the other room. “I don’t know let’s see how my luck is tonight.”

I smiled and rolled my eyes. “Don’t say that! Then you’ll really end up burning my apartment down and I can’t afford a new couch!”

His giggle turned into a laugh. “Sorry, Hinata-kun.”

I kind of wanted to go and look at his amazing smile, but I had a shower to get to. His smile is always one of my favorite parts about him. I love it when he’s happy.

The warm water felt so nice. It felt like all of today’s problems were just washing away. Once again symbolism if this was my autobiography. I leaned against the cool tile while washing my hair. God I hope Komaeda doesn’t actually burn this place down, it was supposed to be a joke. It also felt nice to take all of the fancy clothes off; spring break has spoiled me, soon I need to wear my uniform again, which required a tie. 

After my shower I joined Komaeda on the couch wearing nothing but my boxers and sweatpants. After about half way through the movie I was getting a little antsy. “Komaeda, didn’t you bring anything to sleep in?”

He turned his head to me and gave me a smile. “I can sleep in my jeans, it’s alright.”

I cocked my head at him. “Do you normally sleep like that?” Jeans are pretty uncomfortable.

He turned back towards the TV. “No, but I doubt you want to see me in nothing but my underwear.” 

For some stupid reason or another, my face heated up. Why? There’s nothing wrong with two dudes in their boxers. “I don’t mind, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

He giggled. “No really, I’m hideous.”

“Stop saying that stuff about yourself; you’re actually pretty attractive.” The heat was still there, but I could feel it calming down at the sound of him degrading himself. Is that what I sound like to Nanami?

I could see the top of his cheeks starting to change color like mine were. “Why are you so nice to me, Hinata-kun?”

“We’re friends, you weirdo.” I laughed a bit to show I was joking when I called him a weirdo. He is weird, but not in a bad way. 

“Oh, right.” He then proceeded to stand up, turn towards me, and pull his pants zipper down.

I sputtered a bit. “O…kay sure, yup you…do that.” As soon as the redness in my face went down it came back now in full force. Of course he’d strip in front of me. I brought my hand up to cover my mouth.

He made a sound between a chuckle and a giggle then continued shimmying out of his pants. Looks like he’s a boxers kind of guy too. Then he had taken his shirt off as well. He shockingly had a bit of muscle on him. He looks so lanky in his giant jacket that I guess it hides his true figure. 

When he was done he folded his clothes and put them on the chair he threw his jacket on. Then he trotted his way back to the couch and sat down next to me. “Give me a warning next time.” I whispered.

He didn’t reply just giggled like he does sometimes. “So this is a sleepover, huh? Just like hanging out, but less clothes and sleeping together.”

The warmth in my face was still there. “Don’t word it like that. It sounds weird.”

He gave me a side glance. “But that is what’s happening, Hinata-kun”

I grunted in response and tried to focus on the TV. 

“I dare you to let me sleep in your bed tonight.” The white-haired boy said slyly.

There goes my focus on the TV. “What?”

“Isn’t that what friends do at sleepovers, play truth or dare?”

I laughed a bit it this. “Sometimes, but you didn’t even tell me we were playing, and you didn’t ask 'truth or dare' first.” To be honest I never really had many sleepovers either so I’m just going by movie logic here.

He smiled after seeing me amused. “Okay truth or dare?”

I raised my eyebrow questioningly at him; I’ve been doing that a lot lately. “Truth.”

He frowned at my choice, but soon smiled again. “Would you be mad if I slept in your bed tonight?”

“No, but dudes at sleepovers don’t really sleep in the same bed, that’s more of a girl thing.” Why is he so persistent about this?

He frowned once again before putting his hand under his chin like he was thinking. “You can pretend I’m a girl if you want, Hinata-kun.”

I groaned. “That’s not what I meant; get your mind out of the gutter!” I stood up and turned the TV off with the remote sitting next to me. “Fine you want in my bed? Come on!”

His eyes went wide before smiling at my annoyance. “Whatever you say.”

I turned off the light and made sure to lock my door before walking to the bedroom. Komaeda was sitting on the bed and looking around. “You need some decorations in here.”

I sat next to him and looked down. “Sorry it’s not your style.” I turned off the light resulting in a smile whine from the boy next to me. I have lain down on the side of the bed closest to the wall. “Goodnight, Komaeda.”

I felt him shift so he must have lain down as well. “But you didn’t ask me truth or dare yet.”

I sighed in mock annoyance and turned to face him. He was just inches away from me. I swallowed and backed up a bit. I wasn’t that tired anyways. “Truth or dare?” I whispered.

He smiled softly at me, he looked so content. “Truth. Dare sounds scary.” 

I smiled as well just pleased by his expression. I could see his glossy gray eyes from the light coming through the blinds on my window. I could look into his gray eyes forever, like a swimming pool filled with diamonds. 

His eyes flickered away from me before coming back. “Hinata-kun?”

I snapped out of my trance. “Huh?”

“I said truth.” He said softly.

“Oh right, sorry.” I paused to think of a question. “Have you ever kissed someone?”

He smiled curiously at my question. “I’ve never been hugged before meeting you; I’ve definitely never been kissed.” He didn’t even sound phased saying such a depressing thing. 

“Oh.” Great feedback me, once again. 

He looked away again before looking down to my lips. “I wouldn’t mind kissing you, Hinata-kun.”

“…Oh.” I should get a prize for best responses… SHSL Responder. Hang on. What the hell did he just say? That he wouldn’t mind kissing me? Boring dull me? I’m flattered, but a bit taken back by this. First he says he loves how I make him feel and now this?

He must have sensed what I was thinking because he quickly responded with. “I-I’d like my first kiss to be with someone I trust dearly, and you’re the only one that I do trust and you give me so much hope... Please don’t take it any farther than that. We’re friends, just friends.” He looked a bit panicked and uncomfortable.

I sighed. “It’s okay, calm down. I’m flattered. It would be pretty awkward if we ended up liking each other, because we’re in the same bed right now… and that would be… weird, right?” Oh god now I’m flustered too. 

He smiled in a crooked kind of way. “…Yeah pretty awkward. Good thing we don’t like each other romantically.” He looked about as flustered as I did.

I didn’t know what to say so I just… “Well goodnight Komaeda!” I said and turned to face the wall.

“Goodnight Hinata-kun.” He said as well. 

Thank goodness that’s over. But why do I feel so disappointed?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, I love all of you!


	8. Oh my god.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much school work not enough time.

I woke up still feeling tired with my eyes only half-open. That’s always the worst. I closed my eyes again before remembering I have a guest. I groaned as I opened them again and turned towards said guest.

Komaeda was on his back with his head facing towards me but a nice safe distance away. I’m really relieved that we didn’t wake up cuddling like a cliché love story or something. His hair looked even wilder than usual. I giggled to myself quietly at his white hair looking more like the mane of a lion.

I couldn’t fall asleep very easily last night. I kept tossing and turning which had to be annoying to Komaeda. I wasn’t used to sleeping with people lying next to me. I don’t even remember him moving a muscle in my struggle to sleep last night. Either he fell asleep immediately or he stayed completely still until I fell asleep. I don’t know which of those is more impressive.

I focused on his sleeping form once again. The blanket covered him up to his collar bone and it raised and fell with every breath he took. Watching him like this is hypnotic, seeing him so vulnerable yet content. This is creepy and I’m acting creepy; I need to stop watching him sleep. 

Finally done with being weird I reached my hand out of the blanket and poked him lightly on the cheek. He squinted a bit but soon returned to his natural state of sleep. I almost forgot he was a deep sleeper. I poked again. He squinted again. “Mmmh…” The sound was of annoyance but he didn’t stir, like sleep was his shackles keeping him locked tightly in its grasp. Holy shit that sound that he made was cute and… Something else that I really don’t know how to describe. 

I sighed and rested my head on my hand to prop myself up; it kind of looked like I was posing almost. “Komaeda.” I said sternly. He didn’t move. “Wake up.” Nothing. “There’s a bomb in here and we’re all going to die!” I said loudly, faking fear. Still nothing. “Hope sucks.” Surprisingly nothing again.

Looking at the alarm clock next to my bed I could see it was almost ten o’clock. Going back to bed isn’t a really good idea despite how tempting it is. School is starting back up in a few days and I can’t get lazy now.

Remembering what I did last time to wake him up, I grabbed I bit of his hair with every intention to pull it, but I was caught off guard with how soft it was. With how it sticks up it shouldn’t be this soft. It defies gravity. I ran my hand along it, forgetting about waking him up. I put one strand down and when I removed my hand it popped back up, kind of like in the cartoons. I gently grabbed another piece; I wonder what it would look like if he straightened it. Would it still stick up, but just really spiky looking? That would be funny.

I tore my hand away and felt my own hair. I consider my hair soft, but not as fun to feel as Komaeda’s. I always have pieces sticking up too, especially the one on the top of my head. I should just grow it out some more so it doesn’t. Maybe it would still stick up like Komaeda’s, and then we could match. That would also be pretty funny. I need to ask Nanami later about growing my hair some more.

Looking back to Komaeda’s face I could see his mouth was open slightly, but almost unnoticeable. I wonder what it would be like to kiss him. He’d probably be gentle, and then it would get more heated as he became confident. I’ve always wanted to experience a kiss like that… I used both of my arms to keep myself up as I felt my eyes go wide. It’s pretty early, my mind’s just wandering. Everybody thinks stuff like this when we’re tired. A prime example is last night when Komaeda said he wanted to kiss me. He must have been tired too.

I have kissed someone before. I had a girlfriend back in middle school. God I don’t like thinking about that though. It was so embarrassing. Back then I thought that making out and giving a little peck were the same thing, so I told everyone she made out with me. We have never kissed for longer than two seconds and we only dated for like three weeks. That was the one and only relationship I have had. I think the very next year I started liking boys as well. Never dated a boy though, just thought they were attractive.

I tore myself away from those memories and stood up. I was a bit wobbly standing on my bed. Komaeda still didn’t budge. I stepped carefully over him to the other side of the bed. Then I skillfully hopped off the bed after clearing the hill that was Komaeda. I proudly smirked to myself; this is my calling SHSL Bed Hopper. I’m not so talentless after all. Well I still am, but at least I have a good sense of humor about it. 

I looked behind me to see the sleeping boy… still sleeping. Deciding not to yank his hair out of his head I left the room to find some food, still in my sweatpants. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day after all. After looking blankly at my fridge for a few minutes I decided on an apple for this morning’s feast. I never eat much in the morning anyway.

While in the kitchen I noticed Komaeda’s clothes hanging on the back of one of my dining chairs. His coat stuck out to me. I was hit with the sudden urge to put it on. I bet it’s soft; Komaeda wears it all the time. I shook my head and walked past the clothing.

After moseying my way to the couch since there’s nothing better to do in my apartment, I turned on the game console and decided to try and beat Nanami’s score again. That’s almost impossible, but if I could do it I would brag to everyone. Eating with one hand and playing videogames with the other proved too difficult so I settled on pausing to finish the fruit.

While my game was paused I heard soft footsteps. Turning to see my friend in the door way I gave him a smile. He was still half-naked from last night. He was already smiling like usual, but his smile grew to acknowledge mine. “Good morning, sleeping beauty.” I joked.

He giggled softly. “I’m hideous, but thank you for saying otherwise.” He made his way to the couch and sat with me. I rolled my eyes at his usual self-loathing. “What are you playing, Hinata-kun?”

I took another bite of my apple. “Nothing at the moment.”

Komaeda raised his eyebrow but continued to smile anyway. “Alright, what were you playing before?”

I swallowed. “A game.”

I laughed loudly at the look he gave me. It was like a mixture of disappointment and disgust. I think I’ve seen the same look on my dad before. He smiled again after seeing me laugh. “I like hearing you laugh, Hinata-kun.”

I calmed myself down and stood up to throw away the remains of the apple. “Thanks.” When I sat myself down again I picked up the previously discarded controller. “Want to play?” I asked pointing to the other controller on the floor.

He shook his head softly. “No, thank you. I would much rather watch you play.” 

I turned back to the screen and un-paused the game. “Okay, but tell me if you get bored.”

After an hour or so of me mindlessly shooting enemies and not even coming close to Nanami’s top score I shut off the game and groaned. “Are you bored yet?”

“Not with you here, Hinata-kun.” He said smiling softly at me.

“You wouldn’t have said that about two weeks ago.” I don’t know why that came out. I didn’t even think about it. His eyes lowered. “I’m sorry I don’t even know why I said that.” I said quickly.

He shook his head. “You’re right. I wouldn’t have said that two weeks ago, but I didn’t know you back then.” He looked back up and smiling in my direction. “You’re so much more interesting than what I had originally expected.”

At first I felt offended at his words, but the more I thought about it, the more it made me feel special. “How am I interesting?”

He let out a small laugh. “I feel hope with you like I’ve never felt hope with anyone else, and I am constantly around students with ultimate talents, who are supposed to be the ultimate hope for this world. It’s like your hope is somehow different. I can feel myself being drawn to you, and I have no idea why you even let me be around you.” He paused. “You’re a mystery to me that I feel like I need to solve. Like a map to the greatest treasure.” He was blushing lightly as he spoke and his voice became softer as he spoke as well.

I could feel myself blushing as well for some reason. I looked away from him when he finished. “Komaeda… that is really…” I didn’t know what to say. I could see him from the corner of my eye tilt his head in puzzlement. “Just… thank you. I mean it that meant a lot to me.” It really did. He’s really been making me feel good about myself lately for some reason. He texts me at noon sometimes to tell me to remember to eat lunch. He’s been complimenting me a lot these past few days too.

He moved his hand gently across mine and squeezed. “It’s just how I feel, Hinata-kun.”

I looked over to meet his eyes and smiled tenderly. For some reason my heart was racing, but it’s such a calm moment, so why is my heart beating so fast? “How else do you feel about me?” Now I’m just asking for compliments, blind to how this might look to other people. 

His cheeks were tinted in a light pink and he looked surprised. “I… I don’t know. I’ve never thought about it too much... I think.”

I gave him a confused look. “But you just gave a speech about how cool I was.” I laughed faintly at my own wording.

His expression softened and he laughed too. “Yeah I guess I did. Hinata-kun, you are cool.”

His sudden mood change was a little weird, but he was a little weird so I guess it made sense. “That’s right! Now bow to me!” I giggled.

The marshmallow-head actually took his hand off of mine and stood up to bow to me before I reached out to him. “I’m kidding, Komaeda. Don’t actually bow to me!” I laughed.

He giggled with me. “You’re very indecisive, Hinata-kun.” Then he sat back down.

I fell over to him and leaned on his shoulder. His soft hair was intermingling with my boring brown locks. His shoulder was so warm. “You’re too agreeable.” I said quietly since I was close to his ear.

I could feel him stiffen below me. Realizing I may have over-stepped his boundaries I pulled myself back up and gave him some space. For some reason he looked disappointed after the initial shock of my previous action left him. “Am I too disgusting for you to touch, Hinata-kun?” He said sadly.

Confused, I shook my head. “No I just thought you didn’t like me leaning on you.” 

He laughed quietly. “You don’t have to lie to me.”

I glared at him. “Shut up, you know I don’t think you’re gross.” I said while reaching up and punching him lightly on the shoulder.

He smiled at my persistence. “You’re too nice to me, Hinata-kun.” 

I smiled with him and grabbed his hand. “That’s my job.” I interlinked our fingers. This was the first time I have initiated this gesture that we usually do. It felt nice and it felt even nicer to see his face light up with excitement.

I wish that this seemingly constant increase in my heart rate would go away. It’s been doing that a lot lately and I don’t want to have a heart attack before school starts. For some reason it doesn’t feel bad, it actually feels really good when it happens. I was pulled out of my thoughts from the friend next to me. “I love the way you make me feel.”

I looked over to him and smiled. He knows how to make me feel good. “What do you mean?”

He smiled with me. “I don’t know why, but when I’m with you I feel like I’m not useless and my chest always tightens and makes me feel so excited to see you that my heart beats so fast.” He narrowed his eyes contently, like he was in heaven.

I smiled a bit wider before taking in what he said. Then I was a bit surprised. “Your heart beats fast? Mine has been lately too.”

He looked surprised as well before relaxing and giggling. “Maybe we’re in love with each other.” His giggling slowed and got quieter until he had a sort of neutral expression on his face.

I giggled too. “That would explain a lot.” It was supposed to be a joke, but the more I thought about what he said the more I thought how it would explain a lot. I found myself having the same blank expression as Komaeda had and we both just kind of looked at each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it!


	9. Mhmm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got an 87 on my exam, pretty proud of myself.

It’s been a little while since Komaeda and I spent the night together. Maybe a week or two? I wasn’t keeping track of the time. Classes have started once again at Hope’s Peak Academy. The deadline for the Izuru Kamukura project has officially passed. It’s a bit depressing to think about that wasted opportunity, but at least I don’t have a hole in my head. 

Nanami still comes over sometimes after class so she hasn’t abandoned me now that Komaeda and I are friends. Komaeda comes over too, but he hasn’t spent much time alone with me. I hate it but I’m also thankful. I can’t think of anything without having the stupid boy pop into my head. I just need to spend some time away from him. I can’t just start liking a boy I met less than a month ago.

Komaeda hasn’t held my hand since that morning either. I hate that too. It’s like he sensed that I suddenly started having feelings for him and now he’s grossed out or something. I hope not, that would just be devastating. Maybe he doesn’t even like guys so I have absolutely no chance with him. I shook my head at the intrusive thought. 

I’m in class right now and I still can’t get him and his fluffy hair out of my head. I don’t even want to be in a relationship with him; I just want to be friends, but I can’t help but need more of him. It’s so frustrating. 

The teacher dismissed us and I stood up to head back home. I realized I haven’t paid attention to anything in class and I sighed in disappointment. On my way home I met up with Nanami and we walked together back to my apartment for another gaming session.

She yawned quietly. “Komaeda-kun will come over a little later.” 

My chest tightened at the sound of his name. “Oh alright.” I scolded myself for being caught off guard.

She looked over at me curiously. “Are you alright, Hinata-kun?”

I cringed a bit. “Um yeah, why?”

“You’ve been acting nervous lately. Is something going on?” She spoke softly.

I can’t believe she noticed. Komaeda’s only been hanging out with me while Nanami was around so I guess she would notice. “Nothing’s going on; I guess school stress is already getting to me.” I lied, but I wasn’t just going to give her the satisfaction of knowing that I really liked Komaeda. 

“Gotcha.” She didn’t sound convinced. “How have you and Komaeda-kun been?”

Oh my god is she onto me? “Fine. What kind of question is that?” my voice wavered; she isn’t going to buy that either.

“Just making sure we’re all good.” She said looking forward on the sidewalk. I’m surprised she didn’t press on even further. 

We walked in silence the rest of the way to my apartment. I couldn’t tell if she was mad at me for lying or not. I once again felt tired after the walk up the steps and I half-expected a voice mocking me for it playfully, but that didn’t happen. I wish he was here… Ugh please stop me someone.

After we got ourselves settled into our routine of playing and her starting a streak against me there was a knock at the door. I smiled and paused the game. I hate being so excited to see him.

I opened the door to be greeting with a less fluffy-looking Komaeda. His hair was dripping wet and actually looked more like normal hair with the way it drooped. It was actually really cute and I hate myself for thinking it. “Komaeda, why are you wet?” I asked while grabbing his arm and pulling him inside.

He let me lead him in and he smiled sheepishly. “You see Hinata-kun, sometimes when it gets really humid out it rains. And that means that water falls from the s-“

I cut him off by groaning. “You could have just said it was raining, dumbass” I left his side to go into my bedroom and then to the bathroom, I could hear him giggling as I left. After returning with a towel I handed it to him. 

He took it gratefully, but then looked away with a blank expression. “Thank you, Hinata-kun.” He said it flatly.

I was confused at his sudden change in mood. I hope I didn’t do anything wrong. My train of thought was cut off by Nanami coughing lightly.

I looked to see she was off of the couch and walking over to us. “You two have been acting weird lately.” She said as she crossed her arm.

“What do you mean, Nanami-san?” Komaeda asked before I could register what she even said. 

“I don’t really know myself, but you two only act this weird around each other, I think.”

I didn’t say anything, I couldn’t without embarrassing myself. Komaeda didn’t say anything either.

“Well you two are going to figure it out while I go and take a nap.” She said grabbing my umbrella next to the door. 

“Nanami you can’t just leave!” I said suddenly finding courage to speak. I can’t be left alone with Komaeda again.

“…It worked last time.” She said as she walked through the door. “See you guys later.” Then she closed the door leaving us both confused and surprised.

“She stole my umbrella.” Komaeda just nodded at my words.

We walked back to my couch and I sat down, but Komaeda was still standing. “I’m wet, Hinata-kun”

My inner 12-year-old self giggled, but on the outside I remained neutral. “You shouldn’t wear your clothes while they’re wet.”

He smiled. “Are you trying to get me naked, Hinata-kun?”

I blushed at his words. “N-no I’m just afraid you’ll get sick or something.”

He actually blushed too. “Can I use your shower?”

I nodded, while still red in the face. “I’ll get you some clothes you can borrow.”

He followed me to my bedroom and began to undress behind me while I looked through my dresser. I willed myself to not turn around and look at him undress. I found him a pair of sweatpants and some clean boxers. My shirts are probably just a little too small for him. 

I turned with the clothes in my hand to offer them to Komaeda. I involuntarily stopped breathing as I seen him in nothing but his boxers and shivering. I want to hug him and warm him up. I handed him the clothes and walked out of the bedroom quickly. I can’t stand this lovey dovey crap.

I watched TV as I heard the shower running. Nanami said that we were both acting weird, right? I thought it was just me. Maybe he really does know that I like him and maybe he really does think that I’m gross. I don’t want him to think like that. I don’t want him to like me either.

I groaned in annoyance at myself. “I love him so much.” I didn’t even think about saying it as I whispered to myself. I can’t love him; it’s only a stupid crush. He was so mean to me in the beginning I can’t just forget about that. Even if he compliments me and holds my hand, I can’t just forget about the awful stuff he’s done too. 

However he also helped me realize that I’m not just a waste of breath, he said he was sorry for what he said. He just didn’t want friends so he was being a jerk. He made me turn down the project offer… No he didn’t, I did that. But he worried so much for me during those few days. I want him to like me.

I want to like him too, but I don’t know if he feels the same way. If Nanami said he was acting weird than there’s a small chance that it could happen. I guess false-hope is still better than no hope.

After a few minutes the boy that’s been on my mind appeared next to me on the couch. “Thank you for lending me your clothes, Hinata-kun.” I love how he says my name.

“You’re welcome, Komaeda…kun.” I said softly. I heard an equally soft gasp next to me.

“What’s with putting honorifics on my name all of a sudden?” Komaeda asked after giggling softly with a small red tint on his cheeks.

God why are his giggles so cute? “Just wanted to see how it sounded.” I said suddenly embarrassed for what I did.

“You’re so cute, Hinata-kun.” He said glancing over to me with a small smile on his face.

I gasped lightly. “Don’t call me cute, you’re cute.” I said after crossing my arms defiantly. You can’t just call another man cute, well you can just not to their face. It’s embarrassing.

“I’m not cute.” He said softly, still holding his grin.

“Don’t you dare call yourself ugly.” I said, stopping him from putting himself down again.

His expression went from playful to content. “Have I been acting weird lately? I thought that I always acted weird in other people’s eyes.”

I thought about my response. “You are kind of weird, but not too weird. I don’t see what’s gotten Nanami’s panties in a twist.” Another lie, just the second half of my words though.

He smirked. “Do you think about Nanami’s panties often?”

I choked on air. “God no. I mean she’s not ugly, but she’s just a friend. You’re so perverted sometimes.”

He smiled even wider and laughed joyfully. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

I laughed with him, he’s addicting. “Quit acting innocent all of the time, if this is how you really are.” 

“Oh? Do you want me to show you my true self?” He said slyly.

“What are you a werewolf?” I said mockingly.

He frowned. “I was going to say vampire.” I laughed again at his little joke. 

“Please don’t drink my blood, count Komaeda!” I shrieked playing along. 

He gave me a sort of seductive look. “I do as I please, Hinata.” He grabbed my hand and brought my wrist up to his mouth.

I shivered at him leaving the ‘kun’ off of my name. And then he lightly kissed my wrist. I could feel my heart melt. This was so… I don’t even know how to describe it. Maybe if I play along he’ll keep going… Don’t think of that shit.

Despite having an internal battle with myself I played along. “Oh no! Please leave me alone! I don’t want to die a virgin!” Why the hell did I include that? I did see it in a movie once. I sounded pretty convincing with my voice wavering. I didn’t even try to do that it just came naturally. 

He broke his character a little with his giggling, but then went back to it. He moved his head so his mouth was next to my ear while still keeping a firm grip on my hand. “You know I could always help you with that, Hajime-chan.” My heart already melted, but now I think it exploded. I almost forgot what we were doing.

I let out a breath I was holding and he let me go and backed up a bit. “Sorry, Hinata-kun, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I really am awful.” 

I shook my head, I must have looked dumbfounded. I know my face was red; it’s been doing that a lot around Komaeda. “No you were fine, just surprised me. You’re not awful, stop saying that stuff.” I said while looking down to hide my red face from him.

I felt a hand on my chin making me look back up and over at him.

“Komaeda what are you-“

“Hinata-kun, why are you so nice to me? I still haven’t figured it out.”

I looked at him silently, my head still in his grip. “Why do you even hang out with me?” I asked in return.

He put his forehead on mine and looked into my eyes. “I have already answered that question. I like being with you, Hinata-kun. Do you like being with me?”

I nodded against his head. “I love being with you.” I almost immediately regret what I said, but looking into his eyes made me forget about not loving him. He looked so happy. 

Then he suddenly released my jaw and turned away from me. His smile was gone. 

I was very confused. Why did he change his mood so suddenly again? “Komaeda, what’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?”

He looked surprised. “No of course not. I’m just an idiot.”

“Why the hell would you think that?” Is it because of me?

“I almost kissed you.”

“Why didn’t you?” I had a hard time coming up with how I should react to what was happening. It felt like my brain was going to overload.

He turned back toward me, looking genuinely concerned. “Do you want me to kiss you?”

I didn’t know what to say. I grabbed both of his hands and held them. I couldn’t make words come out of my mouth. 

He looked anxious before inching closer to my face. When he was about less than an inch from my lips he stopped. I closed my eyes. “Can I…?”

I mumbled. “Mhmm.” Then I felt something soft on my lips. It only lasted for about five seconds until he pulled away.

I opened my eyes to see him look down and play with the strings on my sweatpants that he was wearing. “Was that… alright?” He asked nervously. 

I just felt this goofy smile form on my face from excitement and something else. “Mhmm!”


	10. I want to ruin our friendship. We should be lovers instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh here it is the ending. It's kind of sad, but I'm also proud for finishing it.

This is awkward. We just kind of looked at each other after the kiss and now we’re watching TV; in silence. I don’t know what this means. Does he regret it? Is he just as confused as I am? Probably that one, I hope. 

I can’t stand this awkward atmosphere anymore. I turned towards him. “Hey Komaeda…”

He looked back to me and showed sadness on his face. “Hinata-kun…”

Just then the door opened. “I’m back.” We both turned to the door to see Nanami. I groaned, well I guess this will have to wait.

Komaeda then stood up and smiled. “Thank you for having me, Hinata-kun, but I need to go back to my dorm and study.” He said regaining his cheerfulness once again. He walked back to the chairs where his clothes were drying and put his still wet shirt and jacket on. “I’ll get the rest of these later.”

I looked a bit flustered. “O-okay.” They have to be still wet and cold.

Then he walked past Nanami and out the door. After a few seconds Nanami sighed. “Well I guess nothing has been fixed.”

“We kissed.” I blurted out suddenly. I put my hands over my mouth in shock.

Her eyes doubled in size. “Really?”

I closed my eyes and nodded. “Mhmm.”

I heard her hum in concentration and I opened my eyes again to look at her. She had her hand below her chin; she does that when she thinks. “Is that why you two are acting so…weird?”

I nodded again. I felt uncomfortable, but I think I need some of Nanami’s advice here.

“Are you guys together? “ She set my umbrella down by the door and made her way over to the couch and sat in the spot Komaeda was in.

“No… we didn’t even say anything after it happened. I think he regrets it.” I looked down, I had no clue what he was thinking, but my mind always goes to the most negative things for some reason.

She frowned. “Well do you regret it? How do you even feel about him?” She put her hand on my shoulder in a comforting manor.

“I don’t think I regret it… I won’t regret it if he liked it too. I really like Komaeda… despite how he can act sometimes he’s always there for me and I am so thankful for that. I guess I couldn’t help but feel more for him. I don’t want him to regret liking me…” I spoke slowly and carefully knowing that if I got too emotional I would cry and I don’t want to cry in front of a girl. 

Nanami smiled and rubbed the arm that she was already holding. “Well did you kiss him or did he kiss you?”

“He kissed me.”

Nanami smiled a bit wider. “If he kissed you than I think that probably means that he likes you, Hinata-kun.”

“But he didn’t say anything after we did it!”

“Did you say anything either?”

“N-no…”

“Then he’s probably just as scared as you are.” She crossed her arms proudly after hearing me groan at how stupid I was.

“I don’t want us to be scared.”

“Then go talk to him.” She said while having that all-knowing smile of hers.

I paused for a few seconds. She’s right I have to talk to Komaeda. If I don’t then he’ll just think that I hate him or something. I took a deep breath then stood up. “You’re right, Nanami.” I jogged over to the door. “How long has it been since he left?”

She looked baffled at my sudden burst of energy. “Um… about ten minutes, I think?”

It’s a twenty minute walk; he’s going to get soaked again. I grabbed the umbrella. “I have to go.” I said pulling open the door and storming out.

“Wait Hinata-kun! I can’t walk back without an umbrella!” Her voice was starting to sound distant.

“Stay there I’ll be back later!” I shouted without concern of my neighbors hearing me.

I practically jumped down the three flights of stairs and ran out of the building. I didn’t even open the umbrella until I was outside. It was still raining quite hard, but it wasn’t windy enough to make it dangerous to be outside.

I ran as fast as I could towards the school to catch up to the boy I cared about so much. The umbrella was just slowing me down so I closed it and ran even faster. I don’t care if I get wet, I have to find Komaeda. 

After just a few more minutes I had seen the green jacket in the distance walking in the ever present rain. I smiled and shouted as loud as I could over the rain. “Komaeda!” I was still running.

He turned looking shocked. “Hinata-kun?” I didn’t hear him but I was getting close enough to see his lips form my name.

I ran until I was close and then I threw myself on him into a kind of awkward embrace. I dropped the umbrella I was holding onto the sidewalk. He held me close and buried his face into my hair. “Komaeda, we need to talk.” I was panting into his neck.

He laughed and squeezed me tighter. “You could have messaged me, I’m so glad to see you, Hinata-kun.”

“I didn’t want to message you, I wanted to see you.” I let go of him and looked up to his eyes. God damn this height difference, it wasn’t a lot but it still sucked.

He grabbed my hand and interlinked our fingers. “You’ll get sick if you stay out here; let’s go back to my dorm.”

I nodded and bent down to pick up the umbrella while still holding onto his hand, like if I let go he’ll leave without me.

Within about five minutes of us jogging to Hope’s Peak Academy we made it. He led me inside of a building I’ve never been in and lead me down a hallway, all while still holding my hand. We both were dripping rain water all over the carpet. We stopped in front of a door and he swiped his student ID card into the slot in the door. There was a buzz and then a click and then Komaeda grabbed the handle and dragged me in with him. 

“Welcome to my home, Hinata-kun.” He said as he let go of my hand to shrug off his coat. Then he flipped a switch to turn on a few lights in the room. It was a small room with a single bed, a nightstand, a dresser, a desk with a laptop on it, and a door which is probably his bathroom. There were no pictures or paintings on any of the walls and his curtains were drawn shut.

I suddenly felt cold in the air conditioned room and wrapped my arms around myself. “I’ve never seen one of these dorms before.”

Komaeda smiled and reached his hand behind his neck and grabbed at his t-shirt. Then in one swift move he pulled it over his head and off of his body. “It doesn’t feel like home, like your apartment does. You can take off your clothes if you want, you must be cold, Hinata-kun.”

I blushed at him saying my apartment felt like home to him. “Are you okay with me getting undressed here?”

He giggled. “We’re both boys so it shouldn’t be weird.” He smirked at me after he said that, like he knew something I didn’t.

I shivered, probably from the cold… probably. Then I reached up and began unbuttoning my shirt. Komaeda already shimmied out of my pants that I lent him. 

When we were both in out boxers I was still cold and now felt embarrassed for being this exposed to Komaeda. He must have noticed how cold I was because he sat on his bed and went half under the covers and scooted over to make room for me to join him. I did and then it suddenly felt like we were having a sleepover again. 

As I was trying to warm up Komaeda had lain down on his arm to support himself and smiled at me. “Let’s talk, Hinata-kun. Sorry that you have to sit next to something as horrible as me.”

I glared at what he said. “You know I don’t like it when you say that stuff.”

“I’m sorry.”

I smiled at him and ruffled his white hair. I took a deep breath after looking into his beautiful gray eyes. “I really liked it when you…” I couldn’t even say the word kiss without feeling embarrassed. “I really like you, Komaeda.”

“I like you too.” He said after smiling, he didn’t know what I meant.

“No, what I mean is I like you a lot more than a friend should. I know we just met, but I…” I trailed off as he sat back up and cupped my face.

He looked a bit dazed. “I want to kiss you again, Hinata-kun.”

I felt the tightness in my chest again. “I want you to kiss me again too.” 

He smiled graciously and leaned in. I kept my eyes open this time. He tilted his head to the side a bit before ever so gently pressing his lips softly to mine, like he was afraid to break me.

I couldn’t help but close my eyes and savor the feeling. I could feel his hands leave my face and move down to grab the sides of my hips. The touch felt really good. I have never felt like this with another person before.

I tried to remember to breathe through my nose. I reached my arms up and around his neck. I could feel his damp, but still soft hair. I was in heaven.

He pulled away and took a breath. I giggled softly. “Someone forgot to breathe.” I said softly.

He smiled contently and rubbed his thumb around the bare skin on my waist. I squirmed at the tickling feeling. He giggled at my reaction. “I lo-“

I cut him off without hearing him with another quick kiss. I pulled away after I registered that he said something. “Wait what?”

He took a second to recover from the shock of the kiss before smiling at me once more. “I was going to say… I love you, Hinata-kun. I know I don’t deserve to love anyone but-“

“Shut up, I love you too.” I said quickly from embarrassment. I played with his hair a bit with my hands still around his neck.

His mouth dropped open a bit. “You do?”

I nodded. “I don’t know how the hell you made me fall in love with you in a fucking month, but yeah I really do.” Yeah saying ‘fucking’ in that sentence made it a whole lot less romantic, but I got nervous and it just slipped out.

Komaeda didn’t seem to mind as he smiled wider than I’ve ever seen. “I guess I’m just lucky.” He giggled at his own joke. I laughed a bit too.

When I stopped laughing I leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose. “You’re cute, Komaeda.”

“You’re even cuter, and you’re beautiful too.”

I blushed; I hate how he can do that to me. He giggled and nuzzled into my neck. My neck suddenly felt tingly. He pressed a light kiss to my neck.

I grabbed his head and forced him back to eye-level with me. “You missed my face.” I whispered.

He giggled once more, it’s like he just can’t stop today. “I’m sorry.” Then we met halfway in another kiss. This one was a bit different from the other ones. I moved my lips experimentally. He must have approved because I felt him hum against my lips.

He soon began moving his lips in sync in mine. I have no idea how much time went by before we let go of each other. I felt oddly tired after such a kiss. I scooted down and lain next to Komaeda. He reached over and brushed his hands through my hair. “Sleep here tonight, it’s Friday.”

I took his hand out of my hair and brought it to my lips and gave it a tiny kiss. “Anything for you, Komaeda.”

We were kind of squished in his tiny bed, but I like being close to him. I love being close to him. He reached over to his nightstand and turned off the lamp. It must have been connected to the other lights because they turned off as well. 

“Truth or dare Komaeda.” I said with a smile on my face.

He laughed. “Dare.”

I gasped in mock surprise. “How brave.” He laughed again. “I dare you…” I thought about it for a second. “To stop being friends with me.”

He giggled. “I can’t do that, Hinata-kun. I love you too much.”

I smiled and felt the blood rush to my cheeks. I’m glad it’s dark so he can’t see my face. “Be my boyfriend instead.”

I felt his lips brush against my cheek. “I can certainly do that.”

I felt warm suddenly. This is the start of a new chapter in my life. I don’t need talent to be happy with what I have right now.

We continued to play our stupid game of truth or dare until we fell asleep snuggling against each other.

Nanami was fucking pissed though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you guys want I could write some fluffy bonus chapters in the future. Or maybe some kinky stuff if I'm feeling it. ;) I hope you all enjoyed my little story.


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